A new year, a new you!

Well it’s a thought, at least.

Recently, I’ve been advised by several co-workers, a few of the ‘good-looking’ people, and one stripper(who is dead to me) that I am losing weight.

This is totally true. It’s called influenza.

You should try it. I heartily recommend it.

Except for the diarrhea.

In lighter news, I met a great stripper the other night (are you noticing a theme here?) who I was totally into. And I was about this close –> <– to spending some money on her when I made the mistake of asking her for her name.

Vivian. My Grandma who just passed away not even 6 days before was named Vivian.

*sigh*, if only she would’ve said Esther.

Oh, and I can’t forget the little redheaded stripper who reminded me of a certain Worthless Bastards ex-girlfriend from about 10 years ago….hmmm….We had a conversation about occupational choices, and she explained that she has an ‘outside job’ and that stripping is just a means to an end. I explained that no one really cares what kind of job she does unless it involves being on her knees. That set the tone for the rest of the night.

Remind me to tell you sometime about internet dating and drunk women at bars telling me about their masturbation practices (how, when, where and what kind of implements they use)

Ok enough rambling, Happy New Year!

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